Starting Over: Another Year In The Life

Yesterday, I turned 43.

Another year older. Definitely wiser. Much more grateful. My eyes have been opened to what is real and what is reality — and to how we create our reality.

I celebrated my 42nd birthday in Chicago, at mother’s house, ashamed and sad and awash with feelings of guilt over all I had lost personally and professionally.

I vowed that day I would die fighting to get it all back, but not the material things. I would fight to get back the thing that really mattered: my pride, my esteem, my sense of self, my center.

I had lost my way, and all I wished for on that cold, grey, empty November 4th in 2010 was for life to get better, to be fuller, richer and happier.

The most important thing? I knew I could do it.

I knew that I had it within me to rise up from the ashes like a phoenix, rise above our circumstances, to lift myself up with wings of hope and faith and soar majestically towards a better future.

And you know what? I did.

With an awesome life partner by my side, I worked hard, I kept the faith, I persevered and I succeeded.

By my 43rd birthday, I had it all back, plus more: a job, a home, a car and my sense of self.

My center.

But I had so much more: a deep sense of gratitude, a new admiration for my partner, and for the strength of our union. I also had a new appreciation for own continued strength and forbearance.

And there are other gifts I have since received, that I will reveal in later posts.

But what a joy to be able to give the gift of self back to you.

Happy 43 to me.

© 2011, Modern Married Chick. All rights reserved.

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About Modern Married Chick

42. Fabulous. Happily married.Blissfully childfree. Dog mommy. Chicago native, Austin resident. Lover of books, wine, food, dinner parties, politics, great conversation, social media, girly things and geeky pursuits. Striving to be the perfect wife -- with a modern twist.
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